The news is that agency staffing issues will delay our son with autism’s move to a group home (which seemed imminent about ten minutes ago) until mid-October.
Meanwhile, he’s descended upon us with increased nagging and bargaining for his Christmas list (yes, he starts early). Mom and Dad are both on the ragged edge right now after bouts of illness and long work hours, so the din of his demands is a mental and emotional pummeling.
Yesterday we began to dish up a big ol’ plate of vengeance. He came home from his day program with this very sweet guide to respectful communications:
THINK Before You Speak
T – is it True?
H – is it Helpful?
I – is it Important?
N – is it Necessary?
K – is it Kind?
BTW we stipulate that this is sound advice, not just for empathy-impaired people with autism but also for married couples, workplace relationships, social media, etc. etc. etc. The world could be a much better place – Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29, The New Testament)
And yes, that’s a rack of his daily meds at the bottom of the picture. I’m so tired that I gave up on the photo cropping function and I don’t much care.
So we used this against him with great delight,
Joey: Be a good boy there will be presents?
Hateful parents: Joey, is it NECESSARY to talk about presents today?
Joey: When it’s winter there will be presents.
Atrocious parents: Joey, is it HELPFUL to talk about this before the snow comes?
Joey: When the snow comes there will be presents.
Should-be-arrested-and-executed-parents: Joey, is it KIND to keep talking about presents?
Hey, you find respite where you can get it. That’s care giving. And it makes even a smiley faced flower stink some days.