So our son with autism has a new bed coming today.
It is a change made at his request. He managed to verbalize the desire for a new bed in his old room for visits to our house.
We’ve been buying new blankets to replace frayed old familiars. But here’s where autism and the need for predictability comes in. Not only are some of these old items like old friends, they have the ability to make change (e.g. a new bed) more agreeable.
The issue at hand is an old Power Rangers blanket. It is fraying and, while not presently bleeding out fibrous filler, it will soon be in that dryer-clogging-expensive-appliance-wrecking place.
We want to throw it away. We want to make the new bed a new bed, dang it.
But this is where a person-centered approach is important. We need to make such a decision Joey’s. We need to ask Do you want the Power Ranger blanket on your bed or is it all done?
If he wants it, we honor that. If it starts to come apart, then we three have the conversation explaining how it is broken and has to go.
We don’t do stuff only to and for Joey, we do it with him.