Next week Melissa and I reach our 25th wedding anniversary. Yep, silver. Big milestone.
“Which day of the week is it?”
“Oh, you’re home. What should we do?”
“Dunno. What would you like to do?”
“Well, Joey limits our options…”
It’s true. We can’t plan a big evening with the lad around, although in fairness we did get a respite person and some tickets to a concert the following week. And we are planning to have a clergy friend give us a blessing on the actual anniversary day.
But the reality of care giving is that it can eclipse aspects of life that would receive great attention under typical circumstances.
Siblings of special needs people sometimes gripe about getting shorted on attention from mom and dad.
Spouses put dreams off to the side and sometimes let them fade to black.
But all is not gloom and doom. Part of the eclipse factor is that we are absorbed with the possibility of Joey moving into a new residential setting (e.g. moving out) this summer. And with that comes what Melissa calls “this new season” when, perhaps, our life together comes out of shadow.
Eclipses happen. Some people read signs (always almost negative) into them, but they just happen. So it is with care giving. Yes, it changes things. It casts shadows (almost always frightening) over life. But shadows ultimately give way.
The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. (John 1:5)