Day 20 In The Hole

Caregivers sometimes describe a feeling of “being in jail.” A bit of coarse language in this piece by an actual inmate, but what he suggests at the end is important. What do you do to push back at negative thoughts and emotions?

Steven D. Jennings


I am sharing the journal I kept while I did 7 months in the hole.

Journal entry from 12/5/08:

Today I prepared two grievances and two tort claims. The grievances are on Sgt. Paulson for not letting me choose which excess property to send out. Paulson has 3 boxes of my property that he says I HAVE to send out! Yet he won’t tell me what’s in the boxes. I’m confused! There’s no way I have 3 boxes full of excess stuff.

I asked him, “May I have an inventory sheet that lists all the content in the boxes?”

He said, “I’m not going to inventory every single item. All you need to know is its all excess and it all needs to go.”

I say, “Okay. Let me see what it is and I’ll let you know what to throw away and what to send out.”

He acts like…

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