Unwelcome help

Today I’m sharing something I caught on Facebook.  Cassandra T. Roffman, a care giver in The Garden State, calls it My Comical Rant, but there’s some meat to it.  Wish I could claim credit, but it is Cassandra’s brain child.

It contains some coarse humor.  I altered one line for clarity.  And I left the typos and abbreviations intact ‘cuz that’s how we roll on fb.


Ok, so I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m making a list of phrases that I’m sick of listening to as a [care giver]

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”
Nope. Wrong. If you attacked by a bear or a shark and survived, you’d be very badly injured. Not stronger.

“When one door closes, another one opens.”
Unless its on a relay, no, it does not.

“Everything happens for a reason.”
What possible freakin reason could that effin be?! Because this SUCKS and I’ve yet to figure out this reason!

“If you’re going through hell, keep going”
Umm.. I’m sorry, I did not program my Garmin for “hell” and since I’m not getting any satellite signal and because i dont have male parts, I’d like directions.

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.”
STFU Oprah, yea I’d like to have a rich old man too in my life, maybe I could be a little more encouraging!

“Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.”
Yea, well John, bet your plans didn’t include getting SHOT either.

And my least favorite saying:

“Everyday is the first day of the rest of your life.”
I call Bull $hit. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different result. So just waking up everyday proves you have to be freakin insane.


So, dear friends and family (and assorted types who like to butt in), platitudes make care giving stinkier.  Please just be close and let us know that our imperfect selves are loved, respected and valued.  Don’t invoke some magic phrase to make us all better, because you are likely to say something unwelcome that will make the day worse.

4 thoughts on “Unwelcome help

  1. Love this very much. I think these phrases are said because they are soothing for the sayer, who is really thinking “YOUR life makes ME uncomfortable.”

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