One of my jobs (like a house full of kids, I know they’re all there but can’t keep track of them) had some customer service training the other night. It included a Myers Briggs personality test for each person in the department.
This particular test yields a four letter code describing a person’s natural and preferred ways of relating to the world. I’m not going to try and unpack it all here, as there are all kinds of letter combinations describing all kinds of people. I think I scored something like INFJ. Or LMNOP or something.
It’s enough for me to tell you that Myers Briggs, like other personality assessments I’ve taken for this, that and the other job, accurately shows me to be something of an introvert, refreshed by quiet, private time, preferring to think things through rather than just jump in and do, and much in favor of order over chaos. I like patterns and big ideas over micro details.
Yes, cue the laugh track. I’ve let my life become anything but… well… my life.
Quality quiet time is out the window. When I’m alone I usually give in to emotional exhaustion rather than enjoy the space. I spend most of my time reacting to others and handling the tasks and chores assigned me. It starts when the dog pokes at me to take her outside well before the morning alarm goes off, and pretty much keeps up until I sit in a stupor and fall asleep in the evening. The in between affords little time for big ideas; it’s mostly the kind of detailed chores that I enjoy about as much as our autistic kid enjoys using his fine motor skills (hint – he won’t hold a pencil).Melissa isn’t in a place to blog right now, and I hope I don’t misrepresent her here – but I’m 99% sure that her Myers Briggs would show an extrovert, enjoying active time with lots of people. Exactly what her condition prevents. Her life isn’t her life, either.
It’s way too early on a Saturday morning. I can’t sleep and I’m sitting here talking out loud on the keyboard, trying to get at the stress and maybe purge a bit of it.
Whatever one’s personality type, illness and care giving can create a jail-like environment, locking one into a lifestyle deprived of natural preferences and behaviors while forcing submission to unwanted and uncomfortable routines.