Care giving and the horror in Connecticut

I’m sitting here sick, almost to the point of nausea, about the school massacre in Connecticut.

Teachers and school staff. Children. Families. A young man with a “personality disorder.” Care givers and those in their care. Dead. Or dying inside because those they love and care for are gone.

Both social and mass media are full of opinions. Loud, political pronouncements about how SOMETHING MUST BE DONE.

I won’t jump on those here because that’s not what our blog is about. But I will throw in one thing to consider:

The killer, the one with the known “personality disorder,” appears to have lived at home with his mother. As we’ve commented before on this blog, there comes a point where family members, however loving, skillful and motivated, are not up to the needs of those in our care.

Amidst all of the political hot air blowing, perhaps we need to bring up the less sexy subject of funding for institutional placement and care for those who are not criminals but cannot function safely in society. To stop looking down our collective nose at families, expecting them to go 24/7/365 as if they are clinical settings, because “it’s their problem.”

That’s all I’ve got this weekend. Words really fail. Melissa and I pray, but in all humility finding the right words is hard so I’m not going to say any platitudes about that. There are times when even prayer is cloudy and drizzly,

Psalm 88

10 My sight has failed me because of trouble;
LORD, I have called upon you daily;
I have stretched out my hands to you.

11 Do you work wonders for the dead?
will those who have died stand up and give you thanks?

12 Will your loving-kindness be declared in the grave?
your faithfulness in the land of destruction?

13 Will your wonders be known in the dark?
or your righteousness in the country where all
is forgotten?

(Book of Common Prayer, 1979)

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