One of the really stinky parts of care giving is that you don’t always do much – but you wind up worn out as if you did.
What did I do that has me so worn out? I’m not sure I know.
I handled our son’s a.m. routines and then went off to one of my two jobs. I don’t really have a full day off anymore, but on Tuesdays I only work one of my jobs and get done by noon.
Melissa and I had a restaurant gift card from some friends and were looking forward to a lunch date. But when I got home, she was buried in the agony of a migraine.
I sat in the dark, quiet bedroom with her for a bit. But her pain was intense and not going away and we finally called our local clinic to arrange a shot for it.
I drove her to the clinic and we sat in the waiting room. They got us in and out pretty quick.
Got her home, got her settled, locked the dog out of the bedroom and then it was time to get our son.
I drove him to the same clinic for a flu shot. Sat in the waiting room again. He wasn’t happy about it but rolled with it pretty well.
Drove from the clinic to his music therapy. I sat in the waiting area while he worked. He came out of smiling and the therapist said, “He made my day.” So I picked up some fast food that he likes as a reward for his good work.
Got home to find that the dog had compensated for being locked out of the bedroom by barking incessantly, denying Melissa any deep sleep. But the shot had taken the nasty edge off of the migraine. She was ready to try something approaching food, so I went to make her some tea and honey.
Whereupon our son wanted his dinner on the table. And the dog needed to go out.
I juggled it all but ate whatever was handy, ignoring the good diet I’ve been on of late.
So I’m sitting here with a less than ideal dinner sitting like a bowling ball in my stomach, catching my breath before handling our son’s bedtime routines and getting the dog out again. And maybe packing my lunch for my two jobs on Wednesday. Maybe making Melissa some simple dinner if she’s feeling well enough. And I suppose brushing my teeth. Won’t get to the gym.
One of the really stinky parts of care giving is that you don’t always do much – but you wind up worn out as if you did. There’s something about driving here and there and sitting in waiting rooms and doing common chores that just wipes me out.
I think it is the feeling of having no agenda. Not just having an agenda interrupted, but having no ability to even set one. Of just reacting and responding, even in ways that aren’t all that demanding. But ways that devour a day just as sure as trying to pull out a tree stump or other arduous labor, minus any measurable result.